Thoughts: October 2005

Boy Brigands


At the risk of sounding politically incorrect ,I want to say that I am happy my second offspring is a boy too. And before I duck a flying tomato I want to say it has made
life easier for me.
As a mother of an active seven year old boy, I feel I’ve become immune to that particular strain of homo sapiens. I am savvier and wiser as far as bringing up boys is concerned. So when boy no. 2 arrived I thought one more wont hurt.
Read on to find out why and learn some earth shattering truths about life with little boys.

Survival tips

*Buy nice baby wear in blue for your little boy when he is in the less harm full stage.
Once he reaches toddler age, buy pants, shirts, if possible, shoes and socks in a dirty brown color because that’s the color they’ll be coated in for the rest of their lives.

*Buy things for their endurance. The more like you the better. But if your boy is breaking up less fortunate things with the new unbreakable toy that you got for him, get philosophical. No point in getting mad.

*Photograph boys within seconds after their daily bath [if its daily] that’s when you can see the real face under the grime.

*The concept of “fair sex” is a myth .Men might be fair too. I haven’t run my male relatives, i.e., father, husband, two boy brigands and some assorted cousins of the male kind, thru’ a car wash yet. But I have a fair idea they would be a lot easier to look at, once the grime collected over many years is removed from their fair faces. [I am planning to be more politically incorrect. In case you are planning footwear and brooms for me, see that they are good. I could use them]

*I am all for child marriages [the more rotten tomatoes, the merrier] especially if you can send your child to his/her in –laws. But the flip side is you might end up with two children instead of one, but one has to take the risk.

*Though mothers of little girls tell me their darlings are as bad as boys [some yardstick],
I am sure even the worst of them will not gouge the eyes out of a teddy bear or kick soft toys around like they are footballs. So don’t buy stuffed toys.

*You need not worry about beautifying yourself if you have boys at home. No make up can hide the tiredness on your face. Your boys will pay you a lot of compliments whenever they do something naughty and want you to take it easy when you find out about it. Well, that particular habit stays on even after they grow up [for those who do]

*Forget pearls and silks. Both are bad stuff anyway. What you really need is a pair of worn out jeans and T-shirts to mismatch. You’ll anyway be spending most of your life cleaning the floor up or looking for things carelessly thrown around.

*.If your boy wants to leave home after his studies, shed sentimental tears, but let go.
Live on with your spouse if you have any energy left.

I have to sign off now because I just heard a loud crash in the living room. It could mean anything because all the males in the family are watching a cricket match in the TV and…
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© Subasri Narendran 2006 All Rights Reserved